Coming Home

  Coming Home

  By Shawn Lane

  Published by JMS Books LLC

  Visit jms-books.com for more information.

  Copyright 2018 Shawn Lane

  ISBN 9781634868617

  Cover Design: Written Ink Designs | written-ink.com

  Image(s) used under a Standard Royalty-Free License.

  All rights reserved.

  WARNING: This book is not transferable. It is for your own personal use. If it is sold, shared, or given away, it is an infringement of the copyright of this work and violators will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

  No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review.

  This book is for ADULT AUDIENCES ONLY. It may contain sexually explicit scenes and graphic language which might be considered offensive by some readers. Please store your files where they cannot be accessed by minors.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are solely the product of the author’s imagination and/or are used fictitiously, though reference may be made to actual historical events or existing locations. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  Published in the United States of America.

  * * * *

  Coming Home

  By Shawn Lane

  We’d had the fight two days ago. We hadn’t spoken to each other since, even by texts. Two days probably wouldn’t seem like a lot to most people. But to us, it was.

  I’d met Jared Landon nine months ago. Our initial meeting had been fraught with stress and had hardly been conducive to eventually dating. Jared was a firefighter whose station had been called to an accident scene. I was a nurse who had stopped to see if I could lend a hand.

  From there we started talking and somehow, perhaps on purpose, I had let it slip I was gay. I was more than a little surprised when Jared asked me out. Not exactly because he was gay, but more that someone who looked like him—all muscles and chiseled jaw, and sky blue eyes—would want to go out with someone like me.

  We’d been together ever since, really. We hadn’t had sex that first time, though it had been a near thing, but on our second date we did, and more often than not I was at Jared’s apartment or he was at mine.

  Except that two days ago we had a really big fight. About stupid shit as fights usually are. Jared had a tendency to tell me what to do and I had a tendency to balk at it when he did. It was certainly not our first fight. Over that especially. But it was the worst one. It was the one where Jared got so angry he’d curled his hands into fists and was literally seething with rage. I had asked him, only half-kidding, if he was going to hit me. He never had. But just then…part of me wondered.

  Jared had stared at me then as though I had slapped him. Those sky blue eyes had widened as if he could not believe what I had just said. What I had accused him of.

  Before I could take the words back, Jared had turned and walked out of my apartment. He’d closed the door behind him softly, which had been in such contrast to the shouting we had been engaging in just a few minutes earlier.

  I regretted my words almost instantly. Took too long to go after him though, because by the time I made it down the stairs of the apartment building and out to the street, his car was driving away.

  And nothing since.

  Yes, it was true I could have contacted him. With his schedule as a firefighter and mine as a nurse in a nearby hospital, there were days we went without being able to see each other. But we also kept in touch by at least texts.

  With two days passing with no word from him, I knew I had to swallow my pride and make the gesture. I hoped he would respond. I feared he would not. That we were over and that his silence was his way of saying so without words.

  After all, Jared had never said he loved me. In nine months…not once. I’d said it to him for the first time two months ago. Whenever I said it his kisses got more intense, his arms tightened around me, but the words never fell from his own lips.

  I sat on my sofa, staring at my phone. One of us had to stop being stubborn, I told myself.

  I swiped my finger across my phone and brought up texting. Jared was first on my list. I decided to begin with simplicity.

  Hey.

  Instead of waiting around to see how long it would take for him to respond, I got off the couch, put the sound of my phone to on and went into my kitchen to fix myself a grilled cheese sandwich. I had just flipped it over when I heard the chime.

  Heart in my mouth, I went to the living room and picked up my phone.

  Tommy.

  That was it. Just my name.

  Swallowing the lump forming in my throat, I texted.

  I’m sorry.

  Ten seconds passed.

  Me, too. What are you doing?

  Burning grilled cheese.

  Tommy.

  Hang on.

  I went into the kitchen and turned off the burner. It didn’t look too bad so I transferred the sandwich to a paper towel and brought it back to the couch with my phone.

  Back. You at work?

  No. Just got off shift. How’s the sandwich?

  Not too burnt. Listen. I really am sorry.

  Me, too. But hang on. I’m driving.

  I instantly stopped bothering him with texts, of course. I finished my sandwich and threw out the paper towel. Made myself busy by tidying the kitchen.

  I kept my phone nearby for when Jared was able to text me again. About ten minutes went by when there was a knock on my door. I frowned at the interruption. I didn’t get a lot of visitors at my apartment. It was usually Alfredo, one of my neighbors, who loved to talk cooking and wine or my best friend, Chester. But there was always a chance it was a solicitor. Whoever it was, I didn’t want to be bothered with them. Not right now.

  I walked over to the door and peered out the peephole but all I could see were tulips. Tulips?

  Slinging the lock aside, I turned the knob and opened it. Behind the tulips, which were pink, purple, and yellow, stood Jared, holding them in his hand, thrust toward me.

  “You remembered?” I’d once told him early on that my favorite flowers were tulips. It hadn’t come up since then.

  Jared gave me his heart stopping smile. “Of course I did. Can I come in?”

  I laughed and threw my arms around him, then dragged him inside. He kicked the door closed with his booted foot.

  “Am I forgiven?” he asked as I stuck my nose in the tulips.

  “Forgiven? I’d marry you!”

  He kissed me. “Well, maybe eventually. But I was going to ask you to move in with me first.”

  I nearly dropped the tulips as I pulled back to gape at him. “Really?”

  His smile was uncertain. “Is it really so unexpected? I’d actually been thinking about it for a while.”

  “You have?”

  “Yes.” He grabbed the flowers out of my hand and headed to the kitchen. “Let’s put these in water before you manage to throttle them.”

  I shook my head, but followed him in there to get a vase. “You want me to move into your apartment?”

  “It’s more centrally located,” Jared said, taking the vase I’d taken out from under the sink. “Halfway to both our jobs. Yours has a better view though. And the bathroom’s bigger.”

  “Your kitchen is bigger though.” I couldn’t believe I was actually considering it. Getting to this point. From not talking for two days to let’s move in together. “Jared?”

  He set the vase of flowers down on the counter and pulled me into his arms. “You have your doubts, don’t you?”

  “Maybe. It’s soon, isn’t it?
Nine months?”

  “How long is it supposed to be?” He rubbed his thumb over my bottom lip. “Is there some arbitrary time decided by others before it’s supposed to happen?”

  “We just had a big fight,” I said, doubtfully.

  “It was just a fight, Tommy. Couples fight.”

  “I implied something awful.” I searched his eyes, but I saw only warmth. “You know I didn’t mean it.”

  His gaze was serious as he stared at me silently for a moment. “A little of you did.”

  “Jared—”

  “I know why, Tommy. And I don’t blame you. If I’d been through what you had before, I would have reacted the same way.”

  “I know you wouldn’t hurt me,” I whispered. I didn’t want to think about Carl. Not now. Not between us.

  “Never. But it may take you some time to realize that. I get that.” He kissed me. “If you aren’t ready for us to live together, I can wait.”

  I smiled, reaching up to touch his ear. “And if I am? What if I suggested we get our own place? I mean a new apartment for both of us. Then there’s no arguing who has the better apartment.”

  Jared nodded. “That does sound like a good solution. I have another month on my lease. You rent month to month, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Can you wait another month?”

  “For sure.” I leaned in to kiss his jaw. “Are you hungry? Want me to make you something?”

  “No, I ate at the station. Coffee would be good though.”

  I got out his preferred flavor of single brewer cup for my coffeemaker and flipped the switch to heat the water. I was happy Jared and I had made up. And were even going to take the next step in our relationship. Yet I still was bothered by something.

  “Penny for your thoughts?” Jared asked. He was staring at me in that intense way he did which usually happened right before sex.

  “Just…I don’t know.”

  “Still about the move?”

  “No.”

  I pulled a mug out of the cabinet and stuck it in the slot for it on the coffeemaker. I pushed the flashing button for brew.

  “Tommy, what is it?”

  “Do-do you love me, Jared?” I held my breath.

  “Do I love you?”

  Suddenly the “Do You Love Me” song Tevya and Golde sing to each other in Fiddler on the Roof flashed through my mind. I’d played Motel in a high school production several years ago.

  I pushed aside my absurd thoughts, and pushed forward. “I’ve said it a few times, but you never have. And I get it. You’re the silent type. Not very verbally demonstrative. And that’s fine. But I’d-I’d like to know.”

  Jared shook his head and I had no idea what that meant, exactly, but before I could form any really negative thoughts, he was kissing me. And kissing me. His hands moved down to my ass, cupping there, even as he deepened the kiss. We probably kissed for something like ten minutes straight.

  And just as I thought maybe he’d never let me breathe again, Jared broke the kiss, sliding his hand up to grasp my chin.

  “Of course I love you,” he whispered. “How could you even doubt that?”

  “Well—”

  “No.” Jared shook his head, pulling me close. “Never mind. I know why. And you’re right, I should have said something before. I just…I thought you knew. And I don’t always find the words to tell you how much you mean to me. I should.”

  I buried my face in his neck. “I thought you probably did. But-but sometimes it’s nice to hear the words.”

  His smile was tender and beautiful. “I love you. And I want you to live with me. And be with me. Every day. Knowing I can come home to you after my shifts at the station…you have no idea what that would mean to me. You, Tommy, are the most important person in my life. The fact you love me, too, is more than I could have ever hoped for.”

  My breath caught in my throat. It stayed there for a bit and I couldn’t get the words out. I clung to him, hoping that would convey what his words did to me. At least temporarily.

  When I got it together, I pulled back enough to gaze at his face, and into those eyes that just killed me.

  “Those are some words,” I managed to whisper. “When you make a declaration, you really go for it.”

  “I mean them. Every word. And if I never say it again, I hope you remember it’s true nevertheless.” Jared put his hand over my heart. “You own me, Tommy. There’s no one else ever that can make me as happy as you do.”

  I got misty-eyed, though I had tried not to. Though maybe Jared was a man of few words when he did speak, he packed a wallop.

  “You own me, too,” I assured him, my voice wobbling a little. “When should we begin?”

  Jared looked at me quizzically. “Begin what, babe?”

  “Looking for an apartment to call our own.” I hugged him tightly. “I can’t wait to come home to you.”

  THE END

  ABOUT SHAWN LANE

  Shawn Lane is a multi-published author of gay romances and believes love and passion know no boundaries. Happily Ever After is for everyone.

  She has been published by Loose Id, Ellora's Cave, Amber Quill Press, Dreamspinner Press, and Evernight Publishing.

  Shawn lives in California and holds down a boring day job in a legal department of a giant corporation dreaming of the nights and weekends when she can create new stories.

  For more information, visit smlgr8.blogspot.com.

  ABOUT JMS BOOKS LLC

  JMS Books LLC is a small queer press with competitive royalty rates publishing LGBT romance, erotic romance, and young adult fiction. Visit jms-books.com for our latest releases and submission guidelines!

 

 

  Shawn Lane, Coming Home

  Thanks for reading the books on GrayCity.Net